Self healing means recognizing the power of your body to heal itself. It is not about a cowboy mentality of pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, though it can include that.
The older adults in our study emphasized the importance of three themes in the self-healing process. These were physiology, psychology and interpersonal relations.
1. Self Love
Self love is a type of inner guidance system that boosts healing and gives you wise counsel. It replaces the fear-based internal voice that causes you to panic when trauma is activated.
It is a practice that involves prioritizing yourself and your needs like getting enough sleep, eating well, and exercising regularly. It also includes letting go of negative self-talk, and forgiving yourself when you make mistakes or disappoint others.
It means being assertive and not allowing someone to treat you like a doormat, even if they are a family member or friend. It may mean setting boundaries with a toxic person or taking a break from a relationship that no longer feels good. Self love requires courage and a commitment to making self care a priority, so you have the strength and wisdom you need when trauma strikes. It is a daily practice that takes time and patience, but it’s worth the effort. You deserve to be happy.
2. Self Acceptance
Self acceptance is a process that involves acknowledging negative aspects of yourself while also loving and accepting yourself as you are. It is a practice that can take time to achieve but once reached can be beneficial for your overall well-being.
This can be difficult to accomplish because many people are used to judging themselves harshly when they make mistakes. Practicing self forgiveness, spending time with non-judgmental and supportive people, or even getting help from a therapist can be useful tools to aid in the journey toward self acceptance.
When working on self acceptance it can be helpful to remember that no one is perfect and that every human is born equal in value. Additionally, it can be helpful to accept that some things are out of your control and that attempting to change these aspects of your life can be frustrating and stressful. It can be helpful to focus on those areas of your life that are within your control.
3. Self Compassion
Self compassion is caring for yourself when you’re feeling sad, hurt or upset. It’s about acknowledging that suffering happens to all of us at times and reminding yourself that you’re not alone in your struggles.
Studies have shown that people who are more self-compassionate are less prone to ruminating (focused on negative thoughts and emotions, over-identifying with them) and tend to have a more accurate appraisal of their abilities. It can help with self healing by giving you a sense of connection to your experiences and a motivation to keep trying.
Practice self-compassion by expressing curiosity towards the parts of you that seem to cause problems and don’t serve you. They’re just as human as you are and they have something important to say. If you don’t listen with compassion, they might keep getting louder and louder until you can no longer ignore them. That’s when it’s time to take action. A therapist who specializes in trauma can help you learn to develop these skills.
4. Self Acceptance of Others
Self acceptance is a critical component of self healing. It allows you to recognize your positive aspects and embrace your unique differences without comparing yourself to others. It can help you feel happy and peaceful, which is vital to your overall health and well-being.
Practicing self acceptance may seem difficult, but it can be done with the right tools. Some practical strategies include mindfulness, journaling, and self-compassion exercises. Also, a therapy like Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can foster self-acceptance through its focus on values and psychological flexibility.
Other therapies, such as Person-Centered Therapy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, also encourage self-acceptance. Finally, exercise and a healthy diet are ways to show self-acceptance by honoring your body. These activities can boost your mood and provide a healthy alternative to negative self-dialogue, helping you to be kinder to yourself. Moreover, they can also help you understand that the past doesn’t define who you are today. It can even help you develop a stronger sense of self-respect.
